This is the weekly "Help Style Me!" post, where we can share items we are having trouble putting outfits together with. Elaine (in this
post) says it best, "You know, that thing you
bought because you love it and you keep pulling it
out and then putting it away without wearing it?"Please share your J.Crew item (either that you own or are thinking about getting) that you would love help creating an outfit with.
Also, please help out by offering your styling advice. Feel free to include links to your blog (where you incorporated that piece) or to Polyvore (where you showcased an outfit with that piece). Thanks in advance! :)
Hi, all. There's been a lot of good discussion about thoughtful shopping and buying things that we love or that are special or that we truly need. I would appreciate some thoughts from people as to their decision-making processes. How do you know if something deserves a place in your (space-limited) closet? There are some great pieces every year. How do you know (or at least have a good hunch) that a piece will have longevity and ultimately prove itself to have been a good purchase?
ReplyDeleteThis is so hard! I really don't think there's a simple answer. There's a lot of experimenting needed. It depends how often you need to dress up, is your work wardrobe different than your leisure/going out wardrobe?
ReplyDeleteI only work part time and when I do it's totally casual, so my need for clothing is minimal...yet I like dressing up when I can, so for me I try to limit what I buy based on:
Color palette: I'm very strict with this.
Silhouette: does it look good on me, will I feel comfortable in it, will I need special undergarments to wear it?
Price
Lifestyle
For me, I stick to a basic uniform, and add fun with shoes and accessories. I love blazers even though I don't really NEED to wear them, I wear them as jackets for going out, and with the right skirt or pants it's an instant dress up look.
I don't buy dresses anymore. I'm tempted, but skirts and tops work better for me, because I like a defined waist line.
I do try different things, but I try to know what works on my body and what I feel confident in. So, I love my muscular arms and wear sleeveless shirts, but I tried an OTS top and felt very uncomfortable. I am ok showing my legs and wear shorts and mini skirts, but feel very dowdy in a pencil skirt or anything below the knee. I feel like Olive Oyl in long or midi skirts, so as much as I love them on everyone else, I avoid them.
Doesn't leave much, but trust me, I find plenty.
It's kind of like the way I eat. I eliminate certain categories all together. Even though I don't eat meat, gluten and sugar (very rarely) and limit dairy, I still find lots to eat. I don't feel like I'm sacrificing.
Thank you, Suz Has! I love your line "Doesn't leave much, but trust me, I find plenty." That is the exact problem I have. I am trying to be discriminating/picky, but even when I narrow my parameters I find way too much that is both cheap, lovely and that fits! Clearly, I am not being discriminating enough...
ReplyDeleteI'm the same, so I try to sit on things a little bit, try them with a bunch of things, and then return if necessary. I've mentioned I also try to eat rid of things regularly. No regrets there.
DeleteLol, GET rid of things regularly, not EAT.
DeleteToronto Modern-That was my issue while cleaning out my closet this weekend. I like it, it was a good price and it fits and looks nice however it never gets worn. I find it hard to part with items that fall into this category. I am trying to be more like Suz Has and work with a color palette. For me it is navy as the base. Any print that cannot be mixed with navy got the boot. It was the easiest step. I also love dresses but have no need for as many as I own due to my casual work environment. Yet here I sit with three dresses in my cart waiting for a good promo. While I am happy I have not purchased yet, realistically I should remove them from the cart because even at an awesome price I do not need them. It is a work in progress but I have made strides so far this year.
DeleteI agree with many of the tips given. Color palette is essential. Pick your base color...for me it's navy blue...that spans all seasons. Also get really familiar with what shapes fit you. Suz Has mentioned liking to have a defined waist. This is a good example. Highlight your good features...waistline, legs, etc. and that will help you when you're looking at shapes, lengths, etc. Also personal preference. Every time I try something that's outside of my personal style or preferences I know immediately it's not for me. I think we all have a personal style even if we're not conscious of it. It's good to become conscious of it when putting together outfits. I find it interesting that dresses seem to be on the "I don't wear them list". I wear dresses all spring and summer. I don't think they look any more dressy than a tee or shirt and a skirt. I love how easy they are and how they look so smart. I think it's really important to embrace your personal style, how you like to project yourself and be very confident in it. If you aren't wearing something in your closet, there is some reason why. You could spend a lot of time thinking about it but I doubt it will convince you to start wearing it. I personally would give a thanks to that garment, tell it that it still has worth and give it away. Sent it on to someone who will love it. Call it "garment karma"...hee!
ReplyDeleteDon't get me wrong. I love me some dresses! I have just accumulated such an abundance that I am trying to purchase some more casual items. I am the most dressed up person in my casual office and it does not bother me. I feel more put together in a dress and in the summer wear them to work at least three times a week. For outside the office in summer I prefer casual dresses over shorts. I guess what I could really use is more casual dresses that would pull double duty for work and weekends. I can't let dresses get a bad rap. LOL!
DeleteI love dresss too, but I have a long narrow torso so fit is tricky. For awhile I was buying LBDs but I realized they didn't get worn as much as my skirts and shirts, so I shut it down! I think the only dress I bought in the past year plus is a Madewell midi length denim/linen shirt dress. The length is a bit odd for me but it can also work well as a coverup and even a long shirt jacket, so I kept it.
DeleteAgree with everyone's points here, including those about color palette and the shapes that best suit you. That is definitely key for me! I've learned to stay away from certain shades of green and red and that A-lines don't suit my short stature. When I've made the mistake of buying something outside of my usual comfort zone, I've mostly regretted it and these are the items that sit unloved and are eventually given away. Great tips!
DeletePS, @Stray Cat, I, too, love navy as my base and like you, I only wear skirts or dresses in late spring/summer, once that warm weather hits. My favorite thing about dresses for work is that it's one piece and....done!
@Stray Cat, love the garment karma notion. I want everything to be useful for its purpose, and you really cemented that idea for me.
DeleteYah for dresses! It's tricky finding them long enough for me. So many of them are really short....I'm 5'9" and 59 years old so I like them to be around my knee. A little above is fine. If they are too short I feel silly and if they are too long (unless they are a midi or full length style) I can feel a little too dated. It's hard because I don't want them to be too dressy, or too "old" looking for me. Sometimes Talbots or Land's End will have a dress that works. I just love the classic look of a shirtdress with a fuller skirt. The last few years they have been in style...but I don't like the "modern" twists of high low hems, mini length, terrible sheer fabrics...etc. I love the look of sheaths...but I like a defined waist so I usually base them up. I adore the "lady like" look of a crisp cotton dress, cute flats, awesome handbag, vintage looking sunglasses and nice jewelry. It's a staple look for me. It's funny. When I wear a dress I get asked why I'm so "dressed up". When it's the easiest thing to put on! I hope to find a nice new one this spring!
ReplyDelete@Toronto Modern, I'm in agreement with Suz Has on her points. You need to know which color palettes and styles work best for you and try to stick to that. I try to stick to clothing for the lifestyle that I have not the one that I wish I did even though I do have a couple of items in my closet that are there for no other reason than they make me incredibly happy when I wear them. Then it's about quality and price and also their relation to each other for that garment. That's why I love this blog. It's a great medium for info on clothing quality and fit.
ReplyDeleteLike Stray Cat, my base is also navy (black is too severe and gray washes me out). When I am considering a purchase, I think about how it would work with navy but also with the items in my closet that I wear the most.
In addition to color shape and palette, I don't buy trends that don't already feel like an extension of my normal style.
ReplyDeleteExample: I am a fan of the high/low concept and playing with textures, so I was happy to recently see black leather moto jackets become more mainstream so I could pair with something like cashmere. What I won't buy is anything OTS, since it feels too far in the feminine/romantic direction than I would normally choose for myself (although I think the style is beautiful on others). Same thing for the Peter Pan collar that was super common a few years ago.
I guess the other part of that is that trendy items have a tendency to look dated, but if they just "fit" with my typical style, that doesn't seem so apparent.
One thing I think many of us have expressed is a strong preference for high quality materials (and especially natural fibers). Quality doesn't go out of style ^_^
@monica, I couldn't have said it better myself! I buy what works for me, and if that happens to be in style this year, great! I actually like the seasons where the "current" styles/colours don't suit me (like this year's OTS-mania) as then I'm not even tempted when I browse. I just happily shop my closet and not surprisingly, find I have plenty to wear!
DeleteThis is not to say that my closet isn't groaning, as Suz said "I find plenty". I think my biggest issue is finding something I like and buying multiples/similar because they're on sale. One can only wear "so many" cardigans (if anyone figures out that number, let me know!). I'm also guilty of too much "gravy" as was put in a previous post. I love the clothes I have, but don't have the lifestyle for them.
I totally agree with both of you. I avoided the OTS last year and just tried my first, not final sale, so it's going back. I didn't think it would work and I was right. I also don't think the cold shoulder is me.
DeleteAnd there are things I love that cycle in and out, like my tuxedo shirts, blazers, etc.
re: lifestyle, I'm trying to make an effort to wear my nicer stuff when we go out to dinner. Doesn't always happen, but if I have time to change I'll put on something or at least wear heels.
I love the chunkier heels and I hope they don't look dated for a long time!
@Suz, with you on the chunkier heels! I've always preferred them, and am realizing that the way my feet are going, I soon won't have any other options. (Hence my decision to keep the Drake's Giraffe shoes, as discussed in the Reviews thread)
DeleteYes! I bought a whole bunch this year. Red and black patent Sophia's, glitter Sophia's, the glitter heels with the Rick rack, and I wear them all regularly.
DeleteGreat discussion! I'm trying to spend more on workhorse pieces, the essentials like high-quality work trousers that make the rest of the items in my closet more wearable.
ReplyDeleteI think the ever more rapid churn of fast fashion makes it more difficult to curate a well planned wardrobe. We expect new merch weekly and the eye gets trained to constant change. Disposable items don't seem like that bad of an idea when the price and quality are so low.
I try to resist the power of suggestion, too. Case in point: the whole OTS trend. It doesn't work for my lifestyle or my body and frankly it already seems dated to me, so I will pass even if every retailer, blog and insta is covered in it. Even if the whole world is wearing gingham and fruit and OTS this spring, the trends and merch change over so quickly that no one should suffer from FOMO.
You know a trend is over when you see it at the thrift stores! I went to the Goodwill last week and saw a lot of OTS and cold shoulder tops. For me gingham is a classic. I've been wearing it since I was a kid and I love all checked fabrics.
ReplyDeleteHaha, omigosh, that's nuts! Yeah, it feels like it's been done to death at this point. I wish JC would at least switch it up a bit - I don't care for the even OTS, as it squares and broadens my already-broad shoulders, so it's not flattering - but an off-shoulder (a la Flashdancer) would work nicely.
DeleteAgree on the gingham love!
I love gingham, too! In a more classic style. What I really meant was that even gingham can't make OTS work for me. Someone -Cass?- mentioned on another thread that she wished for more sophisticated styles this spring. I agree - OTS is not flattering on me nor appropriate for a lot of occasions, and all the fruit motifs are too cutesy.
DeleteHoping for some new styles and great J. Crew prints in the coming rollouts..
Great topic.
ReplyDeleteAfter pleasure, quality, color, fiber, fit...
I make myself imagine the occasions and people I will be wearing this for. If I cannot find the occasion, or I feel uncomfortable, read embarrassed, when picturing myself in front of my friends, partner, coworkers and the like, then I know it's not me. I am alright with a slight discomfort because I like to push myself just a tad, and my confidence grow along with that, but if I think, no, I cannot wear that in front of this people, then obviously the piece isn't going to work for my real life outside the fantasy dressing room.
The imaginary plat continues. I make myself imagine dressing with the piece several times. Then I realize whether this would make a well-adjusted, cooperative
member of my closet, or whether its a psychopath making demands on me for things I don't have. That is, does it enable me to wear what I have, or does it not help me and mean I would have to buy more just to wear it. If I need to buy more, it would have to be a pretty special, meaningful piece.
That logic helps less if reinventing a wardrobe. Sometimes an identity or fashion sense evolves quite a bit.
Price. False bargains. My mom. So, I have tended to buy what's on sale if I kinda like it. I had to learn the hard way that that is throwing my money away, as well as not honoring myself. My mom always said "don't look at the price". We were not well off. But she knew that one cannot let the price tag dictate how valuable something is to a person. Once I stopped buying things that are cheap but I don't like and don't wear, and started paying up for things I love and can and want to use, I found I actually had a whole lot more money. With things I enjoy wearing on top of it. Go figure. I think of this cheap items I still sometimes consider as "money off". Not spending $18 is $18 off the $70 thing I really want. That's the weird mind trick I am forced to play!
Last of all, if all of that works out, and it fits within the budget, does it fit within goals? That is, how much stuff do you want to have? Do you always want to buy things just because you could use it? Sometimes I don't buy everything that fits the above criteria, even if it's a real love. I am okay with not having everything that's desirable. I used to buy more. Now I'm okay acknowledging that something exists and moving on without feeling a need to possess it. It's been great to hear JCAs say they passed something up that was great but that they didn't feel they truly needed. It's also great to hear of good finds and thoughtful purchases, too, of course.
I've enjoyed everyone's take on this question.
Sarah....brilliant ideas! Taking the emotions (the thrill or momentary high as I call it) out of clothing purchases and analyzing them with logic is really smart. I do something you mentioned as well. When I really want something more expensive and I'm tempted in the moment to buy something cheap I say "ok...but you could use that $24.00 toward that $150.00 item you REALLY want...." and that usually brings me back into focus. Imagining where you'll wear the item, with whom, doing what....I think that's a very good way to realize not only your personal style but stop doing fantasy shopping. Love your ideas!
Deletedemanding psychopath - yes, i have a few of those. they are the Barbie dolls of the closet, once they're ensconced, they want outfits, other shoes, more accessories, a convertible, a boyfriend, another coat. then they need a different job and they need outfits for that.
DeleteSarah, I really appreciate your thoughtful and thorough reply -- it gave me so much food for thought and made me aware of my own shopping shortcomings. Your mom's advice really resonated with me as I am VERY MUCH guilty of buying something b/c 'it's on sale and it's cheap enough' that it doesn't 'feel' like you're spending too much...until it becomes a throwaway purchase, and therefore, money thrown away. I like your connection into how that then becomes an obstacle against buying something that's a love, but that may cost for. Really great response that I'd like to take to heart.
Delete@WFF, love the Barbie analogy! JCAs really do rock. :-D
Love this so much, the thought process and the words used, which totally visualize the concept.
DeleteHave to add, the regret for things not purchased (I've passed things up and still wish I had bought them, even though my purse is better off) is far more palatable than the kind of regret for the purchases I made in error. It's all a learning process :)
ReplyDeleteI know this might seem totally basic, but a few nights this week we've quickly gone to dinner and I quickly changed up my outfits with different shoes and accessories. The base for both looks is a pair of 501s I just cut to right above the ankle. The first night I was wearing them with an eyelet trimmed popover from Madewell, added a Ludlow blazer, red silk skinny scarf tied around my neck and the glitter heels with Rick rack trim. The second time I was layered up with a striped painter tee and a sweater. For daytime but removed it, added a Rhodes blazer in black, the same red scarf, black patent pumps and my red icon trench. (And a red lip). These are total classic pieces and aside from the jeans everything was J.Crew. (I didn't get pics because we left quickly.)
ReplyDeleteYour outfits sound fantastic! I think I own more accessories than items of clothing! I find that I purge my clothing pretty often, but rarely do I get rid of handbags, scarves, jewelry...those things personalize my outfits.
DeleteThank you, and mot important, I felt really good.
Delete@Suz Has it sounds like your strict color palette is really working. Your wardrobe sounds cooperative and functional. Awesome.
DeleteIt generally does. Though seeing Leandra from ManRepeller in a pink blazer and jeans today I may need to add a pink blazer to my collection, but since I can wear that with jeans, a black, white or gray shirt/sweater, etc, it's not the kind of thing that messes up my plan. I have the pink regent topcoat and have worn it several times.
DeleteSarah, I loved reading about your thought process. I'm going to apply some of your screens, especially for sale items.
ReplyDeleteIf you all haven't visited youlookfab, she has some really insightful posts on trends and wardrobe planning. Her style is quite different from mine but I always learn something from her posts.
@Ruffles, thanks, I'm heading over to youlookfab.
Delete@wellfredfred. Ah, thanks for the good laugh. Sometimes, you just have to take Barbie home with you.
ReplyDeleteArgh, I meant to ask about this one the other day.
ReplyDeleteHELP! Awhile back I bought the Rhodes blazer in microgingham. It's an off white base with really dark navy and burgundy microgingham. I love the blazer, also have the same cut in black wool and white linen.
For some reason I find it diffficult to pair anything with the microgingham. It's a lightweight wool (blend?) and can really be worn any season but something about it feels very old mannish to me, if that makes any sense at all.
I've worn it with a gray tee shirt and jeans, but I don't wear it nearly as much as I thought I would. It kind of goes with the ribbon trim on that red and pale gray striped tee with the gold anchor buttons, so I might try to play with patterns with that pairing, but not sure.
(I have a houndstooth blazer in black and white but it's heavier and I've worn it a lot, for some reason the smaller scale pattern is tricky to me,
Here is the blazer. When you see the pic maybe you will understand what I mean when I say it's a little old mannish.
Deletehttps://www.jcrew.com/p/F0306
DeleteSuz, I don't know how much you're into pattern mixing, but, a few ideas came to mind: a navy striped shirt, gingham button down, yellow tee shirt, I could even see me trying polka dots with this... but that's just my quirky, crazy self!
DeleteI tried with a slightly larger scale gingham and it just felt off. A similar scale vertical stripe button down didn't work. The horizontal stripe I mentioned works ok, def a littler quirkier than my usual. The coloring is a little off. Not black but the shades are very dark while the body is light,. Maybe over the summer I'll try again with denim shorts. I was thinking if I didn't return the star white denim they might work (but I think I tried them together and very quickly took it off.)
DeleteThe way it's styled with white on the bottom makes it very fresh and un old mannish. White jean skirt or the new white tie waist shorts- did you already say you weren't interested in those? Maybe something golden as well, like the yellowish cargo pants. I would try a fitted black tee under, b/c I happen to like pairing navy and black. I also have the Collection silk tie waist shorts in navy and I think those would be cute with this jacket. I like the horizontal stripes idea as well.
DeleteI have white linen garden shorts from last summer, I can try those. A black tee might work. I love the tie waist shorts, but I'd get them in black, maybe chambray too. (Of course that's if they fit.) the navy is super dark so hard to pair with navy or black, that's why I liked it with gray or even light denim/chambray. White jeans would work if I found a pair I could tolerate, lol...some new ideas though.
DeleteI haven't loved J Crew jeans. I am trying my luck right now with Nordstrom Rack, as they have some decent deals on made in USA brands.
Delete@sarah, agreed, though I have a few that I like from J.Crew, Madewell. Etc. I used to love 7FAM but I hate hate hate the last pair I bought.
DeleteI'm styling the beaded tassel earrings and Factory leather mules on the blog today. Happy Easter!
ReplyDeleteHeather
Partial to Pink
Hi, everyone. Thanks for the discussion on thoughtful purchasing (and keeping). Emboldened by the words of wisdom, I am tackling my closet. I am trying to reduce the number of blazers, and thought I might be able to eliminate a few based on the number of buttons. Are there any "rules of thumb" re 1 vs 2 vs 3 button closures on blazers and what works best for certain body types or is it just a matter of personal preference? I should be able to tell just by looking in the mirror what is better for me, but I honestly can't say. Thank you!
ReplyDelete@Toronto Modern, that's a REALLY good question, as I've wondered the same thing!! I think you should ask this question again later in the week, as I'm afraid JCAs might not see it at this point, as this post gets pushed down. I'd love to hear tips on this subject, as personally I always feel like there's a button missing (or just maybe that it needs to hit higher up on the body than it does).
Delete